Shame

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I have been dancing with Shame today

but cannot decide

which one of us is leading

I imagine the dance a tango

both of us

struggling for dominance

Our steps staccato

on a polished hardwood floor

The rose in Shame’s mouth is red

I wear virginal white

a tribute to my lost innocence

so hard to get the blood stains out

Shame and I are intimately acquainted

we have twirled around this dance floor together

a time or two before

Shame is nothing if not persistent

a stubborn suitor

who does not like to take no for an answer

Shame wants to dip me backwards

into a pool of self-doubt

quivering insecurity

I resist this advance

Shame whispers into my ear

almost seductively

Unclean

Unworthy

Unlovable

Broken

Shame has whispered these words to me before

a mantra that can seep into my soul

if I am not constantly on my guard

I force myself to stare Shame in the eye

will myself to be unflinching, stone

I can play this game of chicken too

the dance goes on. . .

 

© 2017 Christine Elizabeth Ray – All rights Reserved

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